Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
