i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
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