i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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