i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
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