from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
When did angry sex become our thing?
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
