she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
25 People Confess The Most Awkward Situation They’ve Ever Been In
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
These Are 21 Of The Most Delusional People Ever
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.