Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
These 25 People Believed Fake Facts For Way Too Long
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
23 Adults Confess The Irrational Fears They Had When They Were Kids
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine