I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
