I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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