Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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