ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Randomize
