So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
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