I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
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