Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
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