Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
