So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are