I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Randomize
