I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
COCAINE IS GR8
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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