there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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