i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
