Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
Randomize
