Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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