Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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