how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
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