Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
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