apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
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