But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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