Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
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