In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.