D3 body, D1 cock
So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
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