I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
