She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
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