Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
