He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
Randomize
