her vagine was all disorganized.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize
