Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
she smelled like a LAN party
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Randomize
