what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
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