pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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