Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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