"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
