They totally botched my boob job. My tits look like they're are winking.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
