You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm