Texts From Last Night

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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.

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  (402): I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over. http://tfl.nu/b7hl
  Replies (62) Good night (8040) Bad night (953)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup

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  (203): we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup http://tfl.nu/4fq2
  Replies (25) Good night (3531) Bad night (1552)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?

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  (541): you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....? http://tfl.nu/ofi7
  Replies (28) Good night (4720) Bad night (969)
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.

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  (403): his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly. http://tfl.nu/boxe
  Replies (7) Good night (4100) Bad night (828)
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.

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  (724): i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here. http://tfl.nu/fq3k
  Replies (5) Good night (1165) Bad night (3483)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  i would one night stand the shit outta him

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  (443): i would one night stand the shit outta him http://tfl.nu/aljg
  Replies (11) Good night (5592) Bad night (838)
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  (507): View more from Minnesota

  security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?

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  (507): security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs? http://tfl.nu/7ki8
  Replies (5) Good night (2421) Bad night (904)
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  (516): View more from New York

  nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex

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  (516): nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex http://tfl.nu/zwof
  Replies (9) Good night (3057) Bad night (1078)
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  (559): View more from California

  His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me

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  (559): His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me http://tfl.nu/qdk0
  Replies (6) Good night (1823) Bad night (648)
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night

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  (613): Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night http://tfl.nu/lkdl
  Replies (4) Good night (1519) Bad night (460)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body

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  (440): I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body http://tfl.nu/gs9m
  Replies (7) Good night (1425) Bad night (435)
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  (914): View more from New York

  I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?

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  (914): I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com? http://tfl.nu/sqoo
  Replies (4) Good night (1224) Bad night (500)
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  (805): View more from California

  Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!

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  (805): Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well! http://tfl.nu/91dr
  Replies (3) Good night (605) Bad night (310)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus

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  (304): I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus http://tfl.nu/js0c
  Replies (12) Good night (1664) Bad night (429)
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  (787): View more from Puerto Rico

  come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues

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  (787): come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues http://tfl.nu/x9jo
  Replies (0) Good night (379) Bad night (146)

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