Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
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