just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
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