I got a call from 999 999 9999. I didn't answer it because I was too busy freaking out about the number.
It was probably Jesus.
I feel like he would have left a message.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize
