You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
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