Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Randomize