oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Randomize
