Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I need moral support for this bender
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize
