What a fucking waste of an outfit
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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