My hair reeks of homosexuality.
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize